My Annoying Neighbor and I Went to War Over a Lawn Gnome, We Never Saw the Ending Coming

Just after sunrise, I placed a cheerful gnome beneath my rose bushes, hoping to brighten the yard. Moments later, my grumpy neighbor Josh emerged.

“What is that?” he barked.

“A gnome,” I replied. “He’s delightful.”

“They’re cursed,” Josh warned, eyes narrowing. I dismissed him, but the next day my house was engulfed in smoke from Josh’s “sacred cleansing lanterns,” all aimed at my yard. Game on. I retaliated with ten gnomes facing his pristine hedges. Josh, flustered, called the HOA. Soon, a clipboard-wielding inspector deemed my decorations—and even my porch swing—“non-compliant.” Defeated, I moved the gnomes to the backyard.

The next morning, as I scraped paint per HOA orders, Josh appeared with paint, brushes, and an apology. We painted in silence until he quietly confessed he’d lost his wife two years ago. The loneliness had gotten to him.

“My gnomes made the quiet feel less empty,” I said.

He smiled. “Maybe they’re not unlucky. Just misunderstood.”

That evening, we placed the original gnome back by the roses.

“Dinner?” Josh asked. “You can tell me which gnome is most cursed.”

“Only if you stop burning sticks of doom.”

“Deal.”

Sometimes peace doesn’t come from winning. It comes from laughing, painting, and sharing stories—over dinner, and maybe, a gnome.

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